Ninjas v. Pirates!

So, I realized while browsing the Comic Talk area, BPD has a pirate versus ninja thing going on. Which inspired this thread.

Classic question! Who wins in an all-out fight? One ninja versus one pirate!

Ninja wins all the way. The only reason Phil gets his ass kicked in BPD is because he's incompetent. A competent ninja would never lose to any pirate. The pirate would be too drunk to even realize he's being killed by a master of stealth and martial arts.

Now, I will admit, the more pirates there are, the more even the fight becomes, but one on one? Psh to pirates.

Thoughts?

YAR! Ye be trollin' if ye thinks the jimlads of yore be better then us!

Depends on the scenario. Each has its own distinct advantages. For instance Pirates have long range firepower and would have advantages in any maritime scene. However, Ninja's are more adept at close range situations. But we all must rememer a Ninja's greatest strength is remaining unseen and undetected. Thats why I go with...



ROBOTS!!

Pirates have liquor, okay? Let me tell you something about rum in particular: you become capable of doing anything simply for the fact of believing it to be so.

Ninjas are losers. Sober, rumless losers.

But seriously cool losers.

In the morning, I may regret being so harsh, but right now I can't hold this back.

Bah. Pirates all the way. Captain Jack Sparrow would kick the ass of any ninja that comes his way by his sheer coolness. Besides, I don't see any ninja smileys, do you?

Im pretty sure we'll never know.

But.

There will forever be awesome movies depicting the battles.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEpf_yD2PNo&feature=related

I'm going for Ninjas by the way.

I think I'm going to up the stakes and say...

Pirates vs Ninjas vs Robots vs Wizards vs Angry Hockey Moms. discuss.

Angry hockey moms is a low low blow. Up here in Winnipeg, MB, Canada the hockey moms are viscious daughters of satan. hell hath no fury like a hockey mom scorned. borne on minivans of evil, the hockey moms know no limits. They'll have ninjas and pirates alike chained to the table of torture, forced to enjoy after-game hot chocolate and smuggled bran muffins.

Eigen wrote:...chained to the table of torture, forced to enjoy after-game hot chocolate and smuggled bran muffins.

That doesn't sound so bad...

...wait, what FLAVOR bran muffins? Do they have any kind of spread or topping?

Holy Crap I forgot Wizards!

Well that brings up a whole new aspect. Wizards have spells that can attack at long range, make them selves invisible, and have spells that are effective at close range. However a wizard has to have time to prepare and cast these spells and if they are caught unawares a wizard can have a very difficult time doing anything for themselves.

So hard to decide, I'll have to go with wizards, robots, pirates, ninjas, then the hockey madres.

The WWWizzardd...is buffering. Hold on. Just -- Just a second.

DannyBoy wrote:
Well that brings up a whole new aspect. Wizards have spells that can attack at long range, make them selves invisible, and have spells that are effective at close range. However a wizard has to have time to prepare and cast these spells and if they are caught unawares a wizard can have a very difficult time doing anything for themselves.

Exactly. Anyone who's seen rogue vs mage pvp in WoW knows that it's not necessarily a shoe-in for the mage. Lots of strategy comes into play, and with the right skill the element of surprise can thoroughly pwn leet magic skills.

I am all for magicians! XD They would turn the others into small cookies and eat them! Bon apetit!javascript:emoticonp('')

The effectiveness of a wizard's magic could be affected by the kind of robot we're talking about, too.

Are we dealing with a T-1000 here, or a Tobor the Great? Tobor..."robot" spelled backwards. A robot who was inexplicably not programmed to ignore spoken commands coming from the enemy.

Bad guy: "Tobor, ATTACK!"

*Tobor attacks the protagonist*

Good guy: "Tobor, GO BACK!"

*Tobor turns around and shuffles back toward the bad guy*

Bad guy: "Tobor, ATTACK!"

*it goes on like this for a long time*

I was thinking along the lines of HK-47 from Knights of the Old Republic.

Statement: This meatbag appears to have fallen down the stairs, Master.

or

Query: Why not reduce this meatbag into its basic elements?

Hk-47 Such a cold hearted droid, yet you gotta love him cause he's just so quirky.

He's also dangerous though.

I would suggest a raving group of crazed con-going furs could take them all on. ;-)

FURPILE!

GAH LACK OF INTERNET!

Now... addressing everyone in turn.

Pirates are cool. I don't deny that; in fact I agree. However, coolness doesn't win a fight. Rum does not make you capable of doing anything that you believe you can do. Leading experts have even speculated that alcohol (read: rum) causes certain uninhibited actions, a palling of the senses, and shrinking IQ.

Robots? Get out of here, you don't belong here.

Angry soccer/hockey moms? See, all they have is that... they're angry. As in the case I've stated before, I think this group, as well as pirates, would only win when they have numerical advantage. And even that's iffy, given the sheer kickass-ery of ninjas.

Wizards... um, yeah, wizards win. Sorry, I play Magic, read fantasy novels, etc. Any sufficiently powerful wizard > anything. As long as they don't get arrogant, wizards FTW. But... this is just ninjas v pirates.

Remember people! This is only a one-on-one battle here! I sincerely doubt that any given pirate, no matter how cool he is, would even be aware of the fact that he was under attack by a ninja, let alone quick enough to block or counter-attack.

Lord Grey II wrote:GAH LACK OF INTERNET!

Now... addressing everyone in turn.

Pirates are cool. I don't deny that; in fact I agree. However, coolness doesn't win a fight. Rum does not make you capable of doing anything that you believe you can do. Leading experts have even speculated that alcohol (read: rum) causes certain uninhibited actions, a palling of the senses, and shrinking IQ.

Robots? Get out of here, you don't belong here.

Angry soccer/hockey moms? See, all they have is that... they're angry. As in the case I've stated before, I think this group, as well as pirates, would only win when they have numerical advantage. And even that's iffy, given the sheer kickass-ery of ninjas.

Wizards... um, yeah, wizards win. Sorry, I play Magic, read fantasy novels, etc. Any sufficiently powerful wizard > anything. As long as they don't get arrogant, wizards FTW. But... this is just ninjas v pirates.

Remember people! This is only a one-on-one battle here! I sincerely doubt that any given pirate, no matter how cool he is, would even be aware of the fact that he was under attack by a ninja, let alone quick enough to block or counter-attack.

Well if we're going to get technical about it..

Sci-Fi Sandworms. Head-mounted lasers included.

Winds wrote :

Well if we're going to get technical about it..

Sci-Fi Sandworms. Head-mounted lasers included.

What are you a Harkonan?

Chuck norris owns all ^.^

and you all probably hate me now ^.^ >.<

Chuck Norris is above conflict! He doesn't count!

I've met Chuck Norris a couple times, and even chatted him up at a roast.

*brag brag gloat brag*

You don't mess with the man who can delete the recycle bin. Though I think an alliance of pirates and ninjas may have a tiny chance. Although if that happened time and space would probably rip itself apart with the awesomeness.

I would say that the ninja would win, hands down. Stealth and speed are definitely a ninja's best friends, plus it always helps to either out think, or out smart, the enemy.

In Liz's case, I'd bet on Angry Hockey Moms. But as long as we're traveling to ridiculous proportions, I say that Dragons own all. >.>